Thursday, June 3, 2010

An Open Letter to Barack Obama (Bin Laden)

(there should be a giant question mark at the end of "progress")

Dear Mr. President,

What a colossal let down you have been.  It's hard to fathom how you could be more disappointing almost a year and half into your "new vision" thing for America.  You have done almost nothing constructive.  Yes, we all know you inherited a mess from George Dubya who almost single-handedly destroyed America's position and legacy in the world.  He didn't quite get it totally done though and now it seems you intend to finish the job.  What a massive joke you have been!  Here's a laundry list of things you haven't done so far that could have changed your legacy for the better and fulfilled some of your pre-election promises:

1.  Take the BP spill as a serious threat to national security from DAY ONE.  You didn't.  This could be the mother of all economic storms and your lack of knowledge about, presumably, most economic-based issues is showing.  I know, it's more fun vacationing in Hawaii but you can't wait a single day to address issues like this.  Not one.  This is your job.

2.  Begin in earnest pulling out of Iraq.  Now.  You know full well Bush started an absolute disaster there economically as well politically.  It's not a winnable war.  In fact, it's not a war on anything.  It's a smokescreen.  We're just protecting oil. 

3.  Reverse the bullshit bailout ideology that is gripping American politics like a cancer.  Fucking A, how un-American is this idea of too big to fail?  Yet, you fell right in line with the corruption and this blatantly un-American policy of making the rich motherfuckers who helped make this mess whole at all costs.  This is your biggest failure to date, Obama.  BP might eclipse it though.  Doing the right thing by the American taxpayer?  You sure haven't.

4.  You could have immediately cut taxes for small business owners to spur job creation.  You didn't.

5.  You could have worked on reforming healthcare by actually doing some research first then drafting a resolution.  Instead, you took a sledgehammer and just started swinging wildly.

6.  Which leads me to another blunder:  letting Congress continue to draft laws that they have absolutely no understanding of.  They are like fucking children.  Basically, you could have begun dismantling a runaway Congress that no longer votes according to the whims of those who elected them (the People!).  Epic fail.  You're just like everyone else, no different.  Letting the monster machine and its voracious appetite for control continue on unabated. 

7.  Corporate and financial reform.  You could have immediately changed things by pushing for reinstatement of Glass-Steagall.  Would have solved a lot and quickly.  But, no, like Clinton and Bush before you, you are really all about protecting massive corporations.  Fuck the people.  They are born to be slaves, right?

Bonus gripe:  Are you even American-born?  I'm not much for conspiracies but, really, can you prove it?

I could keep going here but what's the point?  You suck.  Your performance is a joke.  You will last one term but America will be buried by then.  But what do you care?  You'll be making $50k per speech then.  You'll have your $10 million book deal.  You'l be doing secret deals with captains of industry and Hollywood.  Yeah, you're part of the fucking problem, Mr. President.  That's the problem.  And this is why you are and will continue to be an epic failure and a slap in the face of true Democracy...

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